How To Date Billy Walsh || My Opinion/Critic

There were only few things I loved about this movie, and one of them was a statement of fact, "All is fair in love and war". Apart from that, there were a few things I didn't quite enjoy in this movie. I found the plot offensively stale and lifeless. There were none of those adrenaline pumping scenes that leave you anticipating the next scenes.

How To Date Billy Walsh, a new teen romcom from Prime Video, falls terribly below expectations. It is an England set romcom, directed by Alex Pillai. Seeing that it's credit included Riverdale and Bridgerton, I really had high expectations of a more interesting plot.

The movie starts with a dirt smeared, partially shaven-headed Archie (Heartstopper’s Sebastian Croft) crashing into Heathbrook Academy during their summer ball and taking the mic to make a grand speech. We barely hear the speech when it flashes back to the beginning, possibly trying to connect us to the events that led to his grand speech.

Archie is in love with his childhood best friend Amelia (Bridgerton’s Charithra Chandran), but is too cowardly to say anything. He instead resolves to bonding with her over 'fear fart’, jokes about sex toys, and a joke about his D's size which is too cringe because none of those seem like the perfect bonding material for a budding love story. Both of them are losers at the high school they attend, and Archie is an even bigger loser, because he is the butt of cruel jokes for all the bullies at his high school. For someone who was a rich kid, I half expected his character to be the loser.

Archie unsuccessfully attempts many times to tell Amelia he is in love with her, but is too cowardly or scared to do so. He plans it to do so over and over again till his plans are thwarted by the arrival of Billy Walsh (Cobra Kai's Tanner Buchanan).

Amelia, oblivious to Archie’s feelings, desperately tries to get Billy's attention and tries a love doctor's help, who unknown to her, is Archie.
Not only does the whole plot look like a script that was hurriedly written, it totally falls below the bar of most average teenage romcoms. Not one to follow the status quo, but the center of attraction of a teenage romcom, has the typical rich, extremely talented and most times proud guy vibes, not a nice guy who goes around on a power bike. The power bike might have been the only thing that created some form of mystery around him, other than that, he might have passed for a regular guy at the school.

It doesn't help that for a high school, we barely see any record of any academic activities, just a bunch of mean high school kids, at the cafeteria who throw milkshakes at each other, and record it, with a bunch of weird hashtags and laughing emoji’s. Then there's the principal who exudes no iota of authority, and is merely a wanker.

For a lover of teen romcom, everything except the choice of casting in this movie, was simply unbearable and disappointing. A weak hurriedly written plot, with no central theme and a bunch of really good actors who were unfortunate to be casted in what I would describe as the teen romcom flop of the century.

There is no chemistry between any of the actors including Archie and Amelia, and Billy who was supposed to be the center of attraction barely had any charm or swag about him. The only scene that made him seem a little bit appealing, had to be during the swim session and that barely lasted for a minute.

The only thing that was bearable in this movie, is the visually appealing cinematography and the groovy background tracks. The tracks added vibe to what would have been a recipe for insomnia and the cinematography might have been the only thing that kept readers glued to the screen.

The dialogues are also very cringe and very untypical of teenagers. There is no character development of any kind and it doesn't even help that Billy wears the same leather jacket till the very end of the movie.
For someone who was supposed to be the center of attraction, he had no style and absolutely no fashion sense.

I would like to assume that the plot was about an intended love triangle, but the male actors involved barely exhibited any of the characteristics of fighting to win the attention of anyone. I didn't even know if Billy was attracted to Amelia at the start. There was no hint, no trace and certainly no pointer at a romantic attraction from his own end.

I am disappointed at how much Amelia's enthusiasm for the role did not match up with the standard expected for the plot.
When I had a glimpse of the trailer, I had high hopes of a swoon worthy teen romcom, but this movie is nothing but a joke and a disappointment and doesn't even deserve to be classified under teenage romcom.

With such a charismatic cast of British gems, it is so sad that this movie is very messy and missed the marks.
If there's anything that would push this movie, and give it even the slightest watch appeal, it would be the actors and slightly perfect cinematography.

I am also slightly concerned that this movie had the potential of ruining the credibility of these actors particularly for viewers who have not seen them in action, in other worthy movies.
With a running hour of one hour 38 minutes long, this movie is simply not worth the watch. While I was hoping for a redeeming climax, they lowered my expectations even further by giving a shitty and disappointing ending.

If you're one of those hoping to relax on the sofa with your spouse and just relieve the memories of your teen love life, I definitely do not recommend this movie.

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