The Father (film): A powerful look into dementia with Anthony Hopkins

One of my favorite actors of all time is Anthony Hopkins. I feel as though he is just extremely powerful in his depiction of a wide variety of things. While I was not pleased when he jumped on the superhero bandwagon as it was a waste of his talents, I was delighted to find out that this film, which went unnoticed by me somehow, was out there and ready for my viewing last night.

I knew there was a good chance it would be good because that is always possible with Hopkins but I wasn't really prepared for the emotional roller-coaster that this film ended up being.

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I'm old enough that I have been through seeing all of my grandparents pass away. My paternal grandparents passed on when I was very young so I don't really have much recollection of this. My maternal grandparents were a totally different story though. I was already in my 20's and 30's and was very much aware of the slow deterioration of their health. This is a truly tragic thing to have to witness and it is kind of just an unfortunate part of life that all of us have to go through at some point or another.

In "The Father" we get a view into what my maternal grandfather went through before he finally passed on and that is dementia. If you never experienced this in your own life consider yourself lucky because it is something that is so frustrating to both the person that is stricken with it as well as the people that are surrounding that person. While the individual goes through certain points of lucidity, their confusion and lack of memory starts out very small at first, but soon starts to encompass their entire lives. I recall the day that my grandfather no longer remembered who I was and even when reminded by my mother, his daughter, who he did remember, I could see that he was just agreeing so that everyone would get off his case about it, not because he actually remembered me. I did not go and see my grandfather many more times after that. I would say that I regret this terribly, but it was a rather pointless endeavor because my presence as well as almost anyone else, would annoy him to the the point where he was actively aggressive towards our presence and just wanted all of us to go away.

Hopkins portrayal of "Anthony" going through this was very reminiscent of being around my own grandfather when he was going through the same thing.

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In my own experience it became frustrating and even frightening to be around my grandfather during this time in his life and it was a crisis of conscious for all of us, his sons, daughters, multiple grand and great grandchildren, who all started to visit him out of a sense of obligation rather than desire.

In the film this is shown as well as his daughter Anne really struggles with keeping it together around him because everything that she does with him is an exercise in extreme frustration that brings her to tears on a regular basis.

In the film they do a wonderful job of attempting to paint a picture of what it is like for the person that is actually going through the process of dementia as well such as surroundings suddenly changing and people's faces not being the same as it was the day before, even though it wasn't the day before in reality. There had been many days or even weeks between the various "memories" that Anthony has. The people around him are mostly trying to be kind but their increased inability to accommodate him becomes greater and greater as we pass through the film.

This is truly a tragic story, but it isn't told in an intentional tear-jerking type of way but in more of a psychological thriller sort of way. We witness the fear and frustration of the mind of person that is riddled with dementia, as well as the family members and care-workers that interact with him.

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I don't want to spoil the film so I will not get into the specifics of what happens but you, the viewer, will find yourself confused by what is going on as well on screen and this is done intentionally to try to give us, the audience, a view into what it may be like for the person who is suffering from the disease.

Should I watch it?

This is going to be one of the most heartfelt recommendations that I have ever given. The combination of Hopkins' brilliance with a story that many of us will have to go though at some point in our lives results in one of the most impactful films that I have ever seen in my life. The film didn't make a lot of money at the box office but I don't think that was the objective here. This was meant to be a work of art which attempts to explain a very real issue in life, and that is exactly what it ends up being.

_{you can legally stream this on AppleTV+ and it can be rented and purchased almost anywhere for a fee}