Teacher - Parent's Conference: A Personal Experience of an International Teacher

It's that day again!

Teacher-parent conferences are an important part of a child's educational journey because they allow both teachers and parents to freely discuss a student's progress, behavior, and overall well-being. These conferences are critical in developing a solid connection between the school and the home, which will enhance the student's development. However, not all teacher-parent relationships go smoothly. Some parents are difficult to interact with, but others are a delight to work with. Understanding the intricacies of these relationships can help teachers better manage the complexities of these discussions.

While most parent-teacher conferences go well, some can be rather difficult. Difficult parents may exhibit a number of traits that make communication difficult. Understanding the underlying causes of these actions might help a teacher manage the issue more effectively. Just like what happened today in my conference with a paren. Apparently, her child was telling her that I am picking on her in class and that she was complaining about me all year long. When I explained to the parent that I am not picking on her in class, rather I am trying to manage her behavior in class because her child was messing around, chats out loud, and argues with the other kids. The parent was insisting the her child is only having issues in my class, that she's doing great in other classes. It seemed that she's trying to show that it's my fault that her child is getting in trouble in my class, thus, she concluded that I'm just picking on her child. The conversation kept on going, and I told her I don't remember contacting her before other than the incident that I mentioned when I reached out to her. She also got mad that I asked her child about her email stating that her child said I was picking on her. I reasoned out to her that I want to know if she really did say that and how was I picking on her. But then again, the parent is somehow close-minded. I even told her, I also call the other kids' attention when they do the same in class. But the parent just responded, "I don't care about the other kids, I care about mine." I asked her, "Then what do you want me to do if she misbehaves in class? If she's messing around in class, then I can't move her near my table so that she can focus on her work? Then I can't ask her to be quiet when she's being loud in class?" She firmly stated that she will deal with her child's behavior.And I realized that she's talking to me like that to show superiority in front her kid. Then I had a thought, this parent is just one of those parents that are stuck up. I wanted to tell her that I also have a kid and when my kid gets in trouble, I talk to him and remind him about expectations. I never blame the teacher nor think that the teacher was picking on him.

With the incident that happened, I felt upset because I couldn't even say everything that I wanted to say since I am teacher and I have to maintain good ethics and professionalism all the time. However, I always hated it when people talk bad about me and lie about things that I never did or do. It's a sad reality that a lot of kids nowadays lie straight to our faces without any hesitation just to get in trouble. And what's worse is that they can make up stuff just to divert everything to another person. But then again, as a teacher, an international teacher, who is not an American and is teaching in a foreign land, all I can do is to not argue with this kind of parents. It was hard and frustrating that you can't even defend yourself even when you did nothing wrong. But I believe in karma.

On the other hand, if there are parents who are such a pain, there are also those who are very supportive to us teachers. They are open to discussing their child’s progress, both academically and socially. They actively seek feedback from teachers and are receptive to suggestions for improvement. They understand that education is a shared responsibility and are willing to work collaboratively with teachers to create a plan for their child’s success.

Teacher-parent conferences are an important component of the educational process because they provide a space for collaboration, problem solving, and celebration. While some conferences may entail difficult conversations with parents, instructors should handle these situations with understanding, professionalism, and tolerance. By encouraging open channels of communication and concentrating on the child's best interests, instructors may help direct even the most challenging conversations toward positive ends. When parents are supportive and engaged, the connection between home and school can foster a child's academic, social, and emotional development. Finally, these sessions are about collaborating to assist the child achieve, regardless of the problems that may arise.

Just a reminder to some of the parents out there, let's consider that our children may not be behaving in school as they behave at home.